The promise of "In sickness and in health" sounds romantic indeed but a lot of task at hand too. But when done right with your soulmate, it is a cakewalk. Once you decide on a happily ever after, you will want to make it perfect through the tiny hurdles. Especially the lockdown restraining everyone from stepping out might take a toll on your relationships.
Most of the household helps who would make your life so much easier are unable to continue work due to the movement restrictions. In times like these when the “work from home” is being shuffled with time for jobs, personal hobbies and quality time with each other - it might seem like a lot at hand.
It will get very hectic for one person to handle everything and can cause a lot of friction between the two of you.
This is why it is very important to share household chores with your partner. It is also important to share the chores in a way that both of you can do almost equal work and not feel one of them is doing more than the other. This will keep the space healthy between you and your partner and give you time for yourselves.
Doing the chores together at home is in a way quality and fun time too. Here are some tips to decide the household chores (while keeping it peaceful) and easy breezy for both of you. Read to know.
To-Do Lists & Expectations
Take a top-down view of the work in hand to make sure you have complete knowledge of what needs to be done. The definition of "household chore" and "cleaning" will always be subjective. This is why it is very important to lay the ground rules and expectations that you have from each other. It is only easier to meet halfway and be crystal clear about it.
It's More Than Just Cleaning
When you plan on sharing household chores with your partner, it is very important to remember that chores do not always mean just cleaning. It is much more than grooming and moping or dusting and doing the dishes. Include paying bills on the due dates, alternative cooking and meal planning for each day of the week and so on too. Filling the water bottles and watering the plants are also tasks that need to be on the list.
A Fair Way To Divide Chores
You and your partner need to decide on a fair way to divide the chores. Prioritise the chores based on how frequently they need to be done. Then pick the chores that both of you like or don’t hate doing. Once the daily chores are divided, you can slowly move to the weekly or monthly tasks like payment of bills, gardening and so on. This is a fair way to divide the chores equally. However, don't hesitate to exchange the tasks so it does not get boring.
How To Decide
Deciding on who gets what chore is a little difficult. There will be situations where both of you would want to do the dishes or both of you will not want to pick cooking. In such cases, flip a coin maybe or whatever alternative works for you. You can also make it a weekly or daily task for each and pick it alternatively. Some couples choose to do it all together - you can prep the veggies and your mister can cook them and later do the dishes half and half too.
Make it Systematic
Avoid getting into the habit of doing a chore that is not yours on the To-Do list. Picking after your partner might be a one-time thing but that tends to break the equilibrium. It is very important for both of you to do your own tasks and be responsible. Picking after each other is definitely cute as long as both of you do it equally, but then no one is accountable for a specific job at hand which brings in space for "no appreciation" and other issues that you can easily avoid by doing it all 50-50.
Check-in On Each Other
Find a way to check in with each other without making it look like nagging. Maybe getting a reminder on the mobile phones once in a while like a scheduled meeting is better than asking each other constantly. It might seem like you are policing or you might feel responsible for extra tasks too. Plan a weekly breakfast meeting or a monthly one to check on what was done and what wasn't.
Motivations & Incentives
Keeping up with the daily chores can be really hard and you might even start to lose motivation and start lagging. Incentives are always fun and it is only human to put in that extra effort if you know a prize awaits. So treat yourselves with an elite brunch at the end of the month or go out for a picnic to celebrate the disciplined life you both have built for yourselves. If you skip tasks or forget something, make a "Travel fund" where you can put an amount as a fine for not completing the To-Do list. You could also use extra tasks as a penalty for skipping tasks before.
While all these sound like a lot of work, it can be made fun and that way you will not be demotivated. Make a fun playlist for each day and maybe show off some moves while dusting the bookshelves. Avoid any sort of criticism to maintain positivity and do not forget to be grateful for each other. Before you plan this whole schedule, make sure you both agree on the same timetable without any if's and but's.
It is your home and you have made a promise to build it together. Communication is always the only key in case of any hurdles you face. Enrol into some online courses together and work towards improving the relationship or making it more fun than it already is.
If you have more ideas to share household chores with your partner to make it fun and fruitful, let us know in the comments below.