Decoding Indian Weddings: Sacred Rituals & Traditions of Bihari Wedding

Have you ever attended a Bihari wedding? If yes, then you already know how colourful and vibrant it is! Biharis love their weddings, which are rustic and traditional. The soon-to-be-married couple must observe a plethora of rituals. The bride and groom's families participate in several colourful ceremonies that testify to the true spirit of a traditional Indian wedding. A typical Bihari wedding includes pre-wedding rituals, wedding day rituals, and post-wedding rituals and customs. Scroll up to read in detail about these exciting and unusual rituals!

Table of Content: 

• Bihari Pre-wedding Ceremonies
• Bihari Wedding Day Rituals
• Post-wedding Bihari Rituals
• Bihari Wedding Dress
• FAQs

Bihari Pre-wedding Ceremonies

Satya Narayan Katha

Any Bihari wedding kicks off with Satyanarayan Katha, which is organised by the bride's parents. The prayer service or pooja is elaborate, and all the friends and relatives of the groom’s side take part in it. The priest narrates the Katha, and a haven is lit. It remains lit for the whole duration of the marriage.

Cheka

This ceremony is the official engagement at the bride’s house. The groom’s parents and he visit the bride’s home to exchange rings. They carry many gifts or shaguns like jewellery, clothes, dry fruits, and sweets on this visit. Once both the families have settled down, the groom and the bride exchange their rings. The next day, the bride’s family, along with her, visit the groom’s house with shagun and rings. They exchange rings on this day, and this ritual is known as Cheka.

Haldi Kutai

The Haldi ceremony follows after the engagement. All the married women on the groom’s side, along with his mother, make a paste of ground turmeric and then send it to the bride’s house. This Haldi is then applied to the bride’s body. While applying Haldi, all the women sing Bihar folk songs.

Tilak

The bride's brother visits the groom’s house with a Tilak Thaal or plate. This shows that the bride’s family has accepted the alliance. The bride's brother applies tilak on the groom’s forehead, giving him jewellery, clothes, and sweets to celebrate the alliance. He also gifts him the Haldi paste and groom’s marriage day clothes that he would wear at his wedding. The groom’s parents offer gold Nath, bridal garments, and Maang Tikka to the bride, and they send off their brother after a grand dinner.

Mandappachadan

This Bihari wedding ritual involves setting the mandap, or wedding altar. A traditional mandap is made of bamboo and decorated with banana trees and mango leaves.

Haldi Ritual

The groom’s parents and relatives apply the paste made by the bride’s mother, while the bride’s friends and family spear Haldi made by the groom’s mother. Married ladies take part in this ritual.

Dhritdhaari and Matripooja

The parents of both the bride and the groom take part in this ritual, which is observed to seek the blessings of the departed ancestors and the family elders. On this auspicious day, the parents (both sides) offer money or clothes called Paunpooji to ask for forgiveness from the ancestors. Paunpooji is also provided to the family elders.

Silpoha and Imli Ghutai

The Silpoha ceremony, or the rice grinding ritual, is performed as soon as the sun comes out on the marriage day. The groom's mother wraps the rice in a chunni and then grinds it on a Silbatta.

Imli Ghutai is done to ward off the evil eye of Burinazar. During this Bihari wedding ritual, the groom’s mama or maternal uncle advises him to refrain from common vices and habits. He offers a betel nut to the groom. The groom then holds the nut between his teeth. The mother eats the nut after that.

Bihari Wedding Day Rituals

Paricchavan Ritual

On the day of the Bihari wedding, the groom's mother performs Paricchavan or aarti. The whole ritual is conducted before the Baratis leave for the wedding. During aarti, the mother also applies tilak on the groom’s forehead and prays for a trouble-free wedding and a happy married life for the couple.

Baraat Prasthaan

In Baraat Prasthan, the groom and his family leave for the wedding venue. The groom’s car is decorated elaborately with flowers. The car with the groom and his younger brother leaves first, followed by the rest of his family and relatives. Once the Baraat reaches the venue, they are welcomed by the bride’s parents and family with garlands.

Jaimalaand Galsedi

The exchange of garlands between the bride and the groom is called Jaimala, and it takes place at the mandap. Once the garlands are exchanged, the bride’s mother and other married women conduct a Galsedi ritual. The women heat the betel leaves in a lamp and burn them to ashes. This ash is then smeared on the groom’s face. Then, cow dung is thrown behind the groom. This is done in a sequence.

Kangnabandhana and Kanyadaan

In this ritual, the pujari presiding over the wedding ties bracelets on the bride and the groom’s right hand. These bracelets are made of cotton thread, mango leaves, colourful rice, Haldi, and money. A barber cuts the toenails and fingernails of the couple at the mandap. After this ceremony, Kanyadaan is done, where the bride’s parents give her to the groom.

Bhaisur Nirakshan, Kuldevta Puja & Pheras

In the bhaisur nirakshan ritual, the bride is gifted saris, jewellery and lehengas by her father-in-law and her husband’s elder brother or bhaisur. The bride is gifted the family jewellery in this ceremony. After this, the couple prays to the family deity or Kuldevta at the altar. Pheras are done around the sacred fire. Roasted rice with husk is thrown in the fire.

Post-wedding Bihari Rituals

Kohwar Parikshan, Salami and Vidai

The couple takes an early bath the following day and dresses up for Kohwar Parikshan, in which the married ladies of the family check for blood spots on the bedsheet to see if the couple has consummated their marriage. In the Salami ritual, the elders of the family shower cash and gifts on the groom, and then he leaves with his bride to go to her house. This is Vidaai. The bride’s brother escorts the couple to the decorated car and takes them home.

Swagataarti, Mooh Dikhai & Chauthari

Swagat, or a welcome ritual, is done to welcome the newly wedded couple at the groom’s house. Aarti is done and parents shower rice and flowers on them. A Kalash or copper vessel filled with rice, a plate of Alta, and two cane baskets are placed at the entrance.

The bride pushes this with her right foot and then steps on the Alta plate. Then, she places her feet in the cane baskets. In mooh dikhai, the bride is given money, a pair of gold bangles and other gifts from her in-laws. After Mooh Dikhai, Chauthari or Satyanarayan puja is performed to thank god for a successful Bihari wedding.

Chauka Cchulai Ritual

This is a ceremony in which the keys of the household are handed over to the bride. It marks the handing of responsibility to her by her mother-in-law. The bride is also asked to cook five dishes. Once the meal is over, the elders shower the bride with loads of gifts.

Bihari Wedding Dress

Bridal Trousseau

Traditionally, Bihari brides love adorning sarees for their wedding function. And the most loved style of saree that is mostly worn is the Banarasi saree style.

Colours: Whether a bride wishes to keep it traditional or add her spin on modern fashion to her six-yard drape, each colour holds importance and meaning.

• Red/Maroon: Most preferred colour for bridalwear across India, colour red also holds significance as it is associated with prosperity, blessed new beginnings and love.
• Yellow: For Kanyadaan or Vidaai, Hindu friends, even in Bihar, often drape yellow or turmeric-hued sarees with red border, as it symbolises blessed and auspicious married life, as per the Vedic scriptures.

Types of Saree: Widely, Banarasi sarees are most preferred by brides due to their rich look. But traditionally, various parts of Bihar have their own handloom culture, even for bridalwear. 

• Kuchai Silk: In certain tribal communities of Bihar's southern parts (now part of Jharkhand), the Bihari wedding saree is made of special silk, and is known as Kuchai silk sarees.
• Madhubani Silk: Madhubani hand-painted art form is world-renowned, which is also reflected in the Bihari wedding dress for bride of the Mithila region, where Madhubani silk sarees are worn as the wedding trousseau.
• Tussar Silk: Also known as the Bhagalpuri silk sarees, these silk sarees, worn locally for weddings by the brides, are decorated with various patterns and motif designs, and dipped in natural dyes for vibrant colours.

Jewellery: A mix of gold and gold, the brides wear various traditional jewels to match their bridal saree. Jewels such as the Bihari wedding bangles or Chura, Tikli, Nath, Dholna necklace, Chandrahaar necklace, Bicchiya, and many more are part of the bride's accessories. 

Traditional Accessories: Mauri is a traditional headgear made of dry mango and date leaves, which is worn throughout the wedding rituals.

Groom's Attire

Groom's Ensemble: Traditionally, a Bihari groom adorns dhoti pants with a kurta, but with modern trends, Bihari grooms can now also be seen wearing a simple Kurta-Pyjama, Bandhgala Sherwani or suit set in various fabrics.

Accessories: The groom matches their outfit with a traditional Pagri or Sehra, and a stole dupatta.

Footwear: Depending on the attire, the grooms wear Juttis, Kolhapuri sandals, formal shoes and strapped sandals.

FAQs

1. What does Cheka or Roka mean in a Bihari wedding? Are they the same?

Yes, Cheka is the Bihari term which means Roka ceremony in the Hindu marriage culture. Cheka, or Roka, is a pre-wedding and the first ritual where families of the bride and groom offer gifts and blessings to the couple, marking the formal commitment of the couple towards each other for marriage. Roka, in Hindi, means to stop someone. It means that the bride and groom can officially end their search for a life partner, and that they both have been 'rokafied', or formally committed to each other for marriage, this day onward.

2. What’s the purpose of Haldi Kutai? How does it differ from the typical Haldi ceremony?

Simply put, Haldi kutai is the ritual of preparing the turmeric paste for the Haldi ceremony.

• Ritual: The groom and bride's mothers invite married women, also known as 'suhasinis', to participate in the preparation of fresh turmeric paste.
• Process: The women grind the raw turmeric in a grinding stone, singing Bihari wedding folk songs, also known as Sohar, to mark the auspicious beginning of the marriage rituals.
• Significance: The paste is offered to the deity, seeking their blessings for good fortune and a blessed married life for the couple. 

3. How do Maithili or Bhojpuri Bihari weddings differ?

Both Maithili-style weddings and Bhojpuri weddings have a significant amount of similarities as they are both derived from the Vedic culture system of Bihar. However, there are a few differences in rituals that are individual identities of both regional wedding traditions. Here's what differentiates Maithili and Bhojpuri wedding rituals:

• Groom's Arrival: In Maithili weddings, the groom's arrival, Parichhan, is marked with the tradition of Naina-Jogin, where the groom is asked to identify his bride from a crowd of dupatta-covered ladies. In a Bhojpuri wedding, the groom is welcomed with an aarti puja.
• Pre-Wedding Rituals: In a Maithili wedding, Aam-Mahu Vivah is a ritual where mango and mahua trees are wed in the bride's village to seek blessings. In a Bhojpuri household, the groom and maternal uncle participate in the ritual of Imili Ghutai, where the uncle offers advice to the groom for marriage.
• Wedding Sangeet: Maithili wedding songs often mention the divine couple Ram-Sita in their lyrics, and share folklores musically. These songs are traditional and do not include any musical instruments. In Bhojpuri wedding celebrations, the women sing Sohar songs, accompanied by musical instruments, narrating wedding stories with humour.
• Bridal Ensemble: A Maithili bride adorns a light-coloured linen saree, which is hand-painted with Madhubani paintings. A Bhojpuri bride wears vibrant Bhagalpuri or Banarasi sarees or modern ensembles like lehengas with embroidery for the wedding.
• Wedding Venue: Maithili Saat Pheras take place under an open-air mandap, while Bhojpuri weddings don't follow such a mandatory open-air mandap system. 

What is Maithil Vivah, and its unique customs like Ghatkaiti or the Aam-Mahua Marriage?

The Maithili Vivah tradition is an ancient, well-documented Vedic ritual system in the 'Shree Maithili Vivah Padavali' literature, and is mostly practised by the Maithili Brahmins.

Ghatkaiti

It is the primary process of the arranged marriage ritual, where a mediator, known as Ghatak, helps families find a prospective match for their children. Upon keen interest between two families, the Brahmins seek advice from Panjikars to confirm that the lineages of both parties have not been related for several generations, thereby preventing blood (cousin) marriage. Upon confirmation and consent of both families, the Panjikar then writes the union on a palm leaf, officiating the marriage between the bride and the groom.

Aam - Mahua Marriage

It is a pre-wedding ceremonial ritual performed in the bride's village, where the bride selects a mango and mahua tree that are symbolically wedded with a kalava (sacred thread), symbolising blessings and protection for the bride and groom's married life. Overall, a Bihari wedding is considered to be one of the most elaborate affairs of the country. A host of colourful rituals seeped in traditions and culture are performed during this period.

- With valuable inputs from bride Ranee Yadav.

Decoding Indian Weddings with WeddingWire India:

1. Decoding a Bengali Wedding

2. Decoding Hindu Punjabi Weddings

3. Decoding Maharashtrian Weddings

4. Decoding Gujarati Weddings